And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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