I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
