my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
