i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Randomize
