ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
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