we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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