needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Two words: blizzard sex
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
