Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
