Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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