You're so nebulous sometimes
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
