those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
