Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Randomize
