Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
