her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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