people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I have post one night stand depression
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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