In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
