"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
