We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
