I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
