I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
3pm strippers are depressing
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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