you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
