Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize