If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
