he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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