umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
honey bunches of taint.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Randomize
