the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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