U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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