I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
