Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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