HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize