Small penises have feelings too.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Randomize
