So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize
