remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize