he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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