she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Randomize
