Sry I called you an 8
garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
