I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
