he was CRYING into my vagina
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
