Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
