She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
