just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Randomize
