walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
operation have a gay friend backfired
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
