My nipple is on Facebook.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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