There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
