bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
