You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
