oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
