12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
