Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
