i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I would fuck him just for his dog
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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